Hope- That sick little bastard

March 2007- As a 13-year old, I  prayed, hoped and wished that Team India wins the match. Sure, we lost all the previous matches…but who cares? This is Bangladesh we are up against. Bangladesh who rarely defeats and is mostly the defeated team. Bangladesh were the underdogs. I was pretty sure they would stay under. Till the last ball. The last minute. My team disappointed me, went ahead and got themselves kicked out of the match, and eventually The World Cup. I cried like a baby that night. The match somehow symbolised every expectation I had from life. Every thing that I have lost and will lose. Now, it may seem silly to many…but, when you put all your coins on just the number you have THAT feeling about…. losing is not a feeling you’d want to experience.
25th April 2010- Fernando and Shikhar Dhawan drop a ball that was hit by Suresh Raina and bowled by Zaheer Khan. ZaK cussed.  I hoped.
Zaheer Khan drops the same ball hit by the same batsman in the next over. Lost the ball literally by a fingernail. Hearts fell. I hoped.
In the 2nd innings, Sachin got out. I hoped. 27 runs from the last over. I knew we wouldn’t win….but the corner of my self hoped.
After we lost the match, Chennai took the trophy and I bet right now….despite all the negative coverage about the IPL….CSK doesn’t care about anything else. They were a third time lucky and have finally won the match. They are still partying themselves out.
No. This is not about how much I hate Raina for helping CSK to victory or how much I hate the management of the Mumbai team. This is about the futility of hope.
Hope is allegedly a very good thing. It is supposed to raise you up from the low that you feel. It is supposed to give you a reason to live. It is supposed to make you believe. It allows you to see what no one else can. *someone yells THE FUTURE* HAHAHA! I know I have a good imagination.I also know that no one reads this except for a few faithfuls. But then again….hope!
The root of all hope is a simple question. What if….? See, that question always stumps me. Each time it pops up, it brings either hope or disappointment. That "what if..?" is the line on which we balance our fragile lives. There is a always a "What If..?" that keeps us down to Earth.
Today’s What If? is: "What if we don’t didn’t hope?" Stumped. Again. In "hope" of an answer…We wouldn’t have tried to end wars. We wouldn’t have had campaigns against Global Warming. We would not have had a million inventions. Many a famous recording artists would be strumming for pennies. The Universal Law of Attraction  and the Theory of Relativity would’ve been far-off possibilties. The Prophets would’ve gone back to where they came from. Darth Vader and Voldemort would win the battles. We wouldn’t have the IPL!!!
Hope is a human characterisitic. It has been shown in many movies and many books. It is sometimes overrated and is a total bitch. It creeps up and raises you and then abandons you, leaving you to fall like a dead leaf from a tree in Autumn. Call me a Drama Queen, but Hope is my least favourite of all positive emotions. It is absolutely useless and only leaves us disappointed. Sorry, natives of HappyLand….I refuse to accept your demand to be positive.
The first quote I ever remember applying to myself was: "Expect Nothing. Lose Nothing" I forgot it today. I won’t tomorrow.
For now, I shall follow my own and my DumBum’s words: "STOP BUMMING OVER BRUISED BUMS! Suck it up!". I promise to suck it up and be the best vaccuum cleaner ever! I will make you proud, DumBum.
Till the next morsels of life are digested…. remember, all we get at then end of it is
Roger that, will ya?


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